I grew up in a 900 square foot house.  It was small by today’s standards where the average-size home is 2,300 square feet.  I remember driving to move into this house when I was just a few days away from my third birthday.  In fact, the drive to that house is the oldest memory I have.  It was a 3-bedroom house with my mom and dad in the biggest bedroom, my brother and I sharing the next largest bedroom, and the third, really small bedroom was the “guest bedroom”.  What’s funny is that I rarely remember a time when we had overnight guests.  The only one I can remember is my grandma Thornton who would occasionally travel on the train to see us for a couple of days.

I don’t remember when it happened but at some point, my parents decided to give my brother and I our own room.  Since the third bedroom was getting very little use, it seemed logical to give each child their own space.  Knowing what I know about human nature, I suspect a huge factor was the desire for peace in the house.  I really don’t remember big fights taking place between my brother and I, but I am sure there were.  I do remember him having much cooler toys than I did and wanting to play with them which often irritated him.

What really seemed odd about the process of each of us getting our own room was that my older brother ended up with the smaller room.  I’m not sure at all how that happened.  It seems logical that since he was bigger and older, he naturally should have the larger room but that isn’t how it turned out.  I have sometimes wondered if there was some special reason why he ended up with the smaller room.  Maybe there was some special feature to that room that he was keeping a secret from me that made the room really the better room though significantly smaller.  Why is it that we want what someone else has even though we have no idea why except the fact that they have it and we don’t?  That is a blog post for another time.

I wonder how long it was before the desired peace now established by giving each boy their own room erupted into an argument!  What was supposed to be the cure to such problems wasn’t.  I do remember times later after the division of rooms where my brother and I couldn’t get along and my mom would send us to our rooms.  I have vivid memories of slamming the door behind be when entering my room in hopes that the sound of my slamming door would surpass his.  I also remember hearing shouts from both parents in response to the ever-increasing volume of the music being played in each of our rooms.  We each seemed determined to find new ways to irritate each other without even having to be in the same room with each other.

Sadly, I saw the same phenomenon play out with my own children and have witnessed my children, now as parents, dealing with the same situations with their children.  Apparently, we humans have a difficult time sharing with one another.  And even though we may get what we want, our own special place, it still doesn’t solve the problem.

One of the great ideals for those who are Christ-followers is the identifier described by Jesus that those who are truly His will have.  Jesus said:

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. ³⁵ By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”  John 13:34-35

Sharing is one of the things I remember emphasized when I was in kindergarten.  This natural desire to dominate and be in control is one that is slow to be overcome and many of us never really get there.  It is one of humanity’s ugliest traits and it is one that sometimes can be seen within myself when I take the time to look closely.  If you want to see how pervasive this problem is, just take a friend to get a donut and share it.  Carefully cut it into 2 equal parts and almost without fail someone will complain that the piece they got was smaller.

I am on the lookout within myself for flareups in this particular area of life.  Perhaps you would join me in considering how this common problem may be creating difficulty in your ability to live in peace with other people.  The answer, of course, is loving other people, especially fellow Christ-followers, more than we do ourselves and certainly more than stuff!  I hope this reminder about sharing will motivate you as it has me, to see this deficiency for what it really is…a need to put loving one another first!

And by the way, if any of you can give me insight into why my brother chose the smaller room, I really need to know!!!